its been awhile since i have blogged last. Reading everyone’s made me miss it kind of because they are all really good.

but now blogging again i remembered why i stopped: its stupid. maybe? is it? i didnt think so but then i was told so, so it is.

I always have my opinion about something and i think, yes that is what it is! Whether it is awesome or dull, that is what it is to me, right? I do sometimes think about it and it changes my mind but not too often. But then with other people you can get a whole different opinion about it and you realize that thats it and what you thought was really wasnt and linger in the fact that they are right and you are wrong. So what they say can change your whole entire mind-set on that one thing. It can be a good thing! It is very often a great thing when someone says something and you realize, oh i never thought about it like that. I’m not talking the big stuff. I am talking when you hold up a dress and shining in its perfection when your mom sees it and says “thats what hookers wear.” then you realize it is short on your rather long legs and there is no way that it will stay up with no straps. Or your listening to a great song over and over again and it really hits you and your friend says “It sounds like they are whining.” And you realize their voice is kind of high and repeting the line ‘your all i have’ is kind of pathetic at a point. OR, last one, when you wrote a blog to describe a trip you just went on and you think it is really cool the way you introduced the fear and anxiety you had when meeting kids and serving them for a week just to hear you friend say “i finally read a blog and your was first and i thought it was stupid.” And you realize that all that effort you spent trying to write how your hands were shaking and how you were too nervous too speak was all for nothing.
And you try to look at it from a different perspective as, not everyone is going to like your writing or he just didnt read it right… but no matter what happens no one else said anything and when you ask family they say its fine but really they are just family and its not the same… as a friend …

saying its stupid.